Friday, December 19, 2014

Farley's Draft 2

Hallu. assalamualaikum wbt :)

Okay I made it clear in my previous post how hopeless I could be when Im in love. Ahah now you're judging right............... hahahaha just kidding lol

Trust me this was still me in my draft. I could have just deleted this draft with the photo and the caption because back then, this post was meant for someone else.

But the reason Im posting it, is BECAUSE, Im hopeless. But this is my blog anyway; why would I care and worry about anything.

I am actually disappointed with the fact that I have fallen for someone and not have the courage to start anything (even a little conversation) but what can I do, this is me. It hurts but WHAT CAN I DO?

Lol, let's not judge me. Im not pathetic. In fact, I didnt look up for any quote. It's just already there in my draft. So I thought yeaaaaa, why not. Plus, the guy doesnt even know me. And I have like the slightest chance to meet him again unless he's really my jodoh. (lol geli)

BUT YEAH. Let's just conclude it as that. (Im moving on btw. I let God do the rest for me.)

“It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.”

Dont judge. Im moving on I told ya. AHahaha.

Thanks for dropping by.

Farzana Rosley

Farley's Draft 1 #FarWrites

Okay. Let me make this thing clear. *assalamualaikum wbt by the way ahahah.

Once upon a time, I was a high school kid. Just like some people (most people I would say), I did become stupid. I was in 'love' I believe.

*trust me I've moved on, but as I was browsing through my old posts/drafts in my blogger dashboard, I actually found this poem made by me (lol how geli) but I honestly am impressed with myself.

Im so goooood man. So yeah, mind being in love with me? I might gonna write something for it. Lol jk jk. Not interested in any unless you're my crush. (again, jk!)

Trust me I have moved on. No hard feelings anymore, I even forgot how my ex looks like (haaaa lies I told, jk. he's still a friend in fb) but we're good. 

But even if him or any of my friends who used to know me and my stupid old days encounter this post, TRUST ME Im posting this poem just because I THINK IM FREAKING GOOD AT WRITING AND RHYMING.

Okay. Here it is. 

…buat dia yang pernah kuucapkan sayang

Pernah sekali kubilang cinta
Pada kau jejaka mutiara
Kau membalas mengucap rasa
Pada aku gadis permata
Kita kononnya ditakdir bersama
Pada usia mengenal matang
Bermimpi bersama hingga ke jinjang.

Kau jejaka manis belaka
Sayangku kau panggil
Hingga jatuh aku menggigil.
Saat kau harus pergi
Mengikut orang tua kesana ke mari
Jatuh air mataku tak pernah henti.

Lagu indah buatku kau dendang
menunjuk rasamu yang rancak bergendang
tersenyum aku dalam tangis tak hilang
engkau jejaka pandai membilang.

hilang kau tak berkhabar berita
bukan terjumpa si gadis baru
namun terlupa aku yang satu
akhirnya aku terus berharap
menanti janjimu kau ucap dulu
biar apapun terjadi kausayang aku
takkan dilupa biar tubuh kaku.

Hai jejaka penglipur lara,
sedih aku tak boleh dikira
tersenyum aku menerima berita
tersayu aku bukan kau si pencerita
hidup barumu indah belaka
teman baru keliling saja
bukan aku,
 malah sahabat turut dilupa.

Sedarlah wahai jejaka
aku ini insan biasa
andai aku masih kausuka
ucapkanlah cinta seperti dulu
katakanlah sayang selagi mampu.

bukan perlu berganti hari
setiap saat jauh sekali
sekadar bertanya khabar ku pinta
agar kutahu kaumasih setia.

andai bukan aku untukmu
ucapkanlah tulus sejujurnya
sahabat selamanya kita bersama
itulah permulaan yang sebenarnya kita pernah bina.

buat kau yang pernah kuucapkan sayang,
hati ini tak pernah lekang
berdoa untukmu agar tak bimbang
hati yang lara Tuhan yang tahu
tersenyum megah di khalayak
menangis lemah kala bersendiri.

buat kau yang pernah kuucapkan sayang,
jujurlah padaku andai kau tak lagi suka
tinggalkanlah aku biar kita menjadi biasa
kau teman tetap sahabatku.

….buat kau yang pernah kuucapkan sayang
Sedarlah tulisku bukan sahaja
Coretanku bukan yang biasa
Untukmu kuluah dalam cerita
Agar kaufaham apa kurasa
Senyumlah sahabat yang pernah ku cinta
Aku hanyalah insan biasa,
Temanmu yang cuba mencoret rasa.

KAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH so funneh right. Okay you may throw up now >.< But you cant deny that Im good right?! Ahah told you so.

And trust me. It's an old thing. Cant even find what was the date (but it was absolutely in 2010 I could tell ya ahaha)

So yeah, thanks for reading! (if there's any.)

Farzana Rosley.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014


Assalamualaikum wbt and hellooooooooooooooo everyone :)

Well today I wanna something. Not that I wanna brag, but I think it's something congratulate myself. 

Ever since I entered high school, honestly I never went onto stage because of my examination result.

If my name was called onto the stage, it was either an award for winning the poem recitation other co-curricular achievements.

During my PMR result, I got 7a's so surely I just have to go pick my result at class counters. As for SPM, hahahaha I wouldnt even expect my name to be called. I just waited for the straight A names to finish being called and definitely go straight to my class' counter. 

Im not saying Im smart or good enough, but Im really grateful to be given the chance to represent my batch and go onto the stage. 
Me on stage heeee :) With our PPIP's Dean. Uncle's friend, Prof Rashid.

It was our Pusat Pengajian's Hari Guru event last Tuesday (yesterday as I was writing) that they call out names and we got to go on stage and take the certificate as the batch representative.

:) alhamdulillah. *baju ni pakai masa 1st day in USM heee. #deep la konon padahal lepas ambil gambar baru sedar :3

Seriously, Im really happy and grateful. And I wouldn't say it's a great achievement. If it wasnt for His help, I wouldnt be there on stage. If it wasnt for Him to allow it to happen, I wont get to experience this great thing.

And to be honest, last semester's examination wasnt fully on papers. Almost half of them were 100% coursework subjects which requires us to work in groups. Therefore, I would credit to my fellow groupmates in any subject I managed to score. I would also like to thank my friends for helping me out whenever I was in dazed and stressful. Beta blur, kalian banyak guide. Thank you. Thankyou umi abah atas iringan doa.

Alhamdulillah. Moh maintain result ye! #partypeople ! WORK HARD PLAY HARD

Alhamdulillah. Im grateful. And one thing about achieving something is that we have to realise that an award could also be a test. Always return to Him and be grateful. Thank you Allah.

I wont expect a lot from me this semester. I will try and do my best as usual inshaAllah. I dont want to be the top-scorer or best-student but all I want is to do the best out of me and maintain my result. Apapun, in the end, serahkan segala keputusan to Him. Hamba tawakkal dan redha. Permudahkanlah the rest of our journey here in USM inshaAllah.

Terima kasih manusia Hilton banyak tolong, selalu gerak bangun pagi dan sebagainya ahahaha :3

Moga Allah redha. Alhamdulillah :') #bepositive #begrateful #fightingfar :)


Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Book Review #2: Hidden by Marianne Curley

Assalamualaikum wbt and hello there!

So today I just finished reading the book Hidden by Marianne Curley.

It's a breathtaking book, where I couldn't stop but I had to because of some other things to be done. However, Im gonna write a review today!

My first review was ok for me but considering the fact that I have learnt Basic Literature, I would improve my review posts from time to time okay? :) Therefore, I would be glad if there's anyone who would to share with me tips and ways of writing a good one. 

As for me, I'll keep writing from my point of view - basically what I felt throughout the reading so I would give you the feeling of excitement to read the book yourself! :D

Book Review #2: Hidden by Marianne Curley 

Hidden is a beautifully-written novel about angels that come from Avena. The way the author explained the characters and places actually helped me a lot in imagining the places beautifully, making it a good book to be read. You dont want to go buy a book that is simply written right?

The one I uploaded on my Instagram and Tumblr xD
First I would go with the P-O-V.

Ahah, here comes the Literature thingy but I would write it in a simple way; which would tell that literature is pretty :) 

The author writes the story from two people's Point Of View.
1. The main character - Ebony Hawkins.
2. Jordan Blake.

These two characters are very important as portrayed by the author. 

If it wasn't for Jordan's meeting with Ebony, a spark of light would never occur and Nathaneal and the Dark King would not start doing their finding of this "Hidden" person.

Just like Ebony and Jordan, Nathaneal and Dark King are both important in these story. The journey would never be there if it was not for their existence.

Next, Im gonna go with the storyline. It was all mysterious but pretty and beautiful at the same time when the main character, Ebony described her life. 

The life she was living was quite perfect, except that her parents were overprotective. Little did she know that there was a story behind it and the fact that she was not her parents' real daughter but rather adopted.

And before she could hear the whole truth about herself, her parents went missing in a fire that had happened at their house. Not they're dead, but MISSING!

That's when the whole confusion and journey started. Ebony needs to find the truth while searching for her missing parents since their bodies weren't found at the place of incident. A few changes happened to her body, which not only make her need to find who is she, but also WHAT is she?

Here comes the part of my opinion :)

The person who suggested this book was my friend, Shamin. And I never thought it would be a sequel novel. However, the fact that it is a sequel did not make me feel sad at all but rather liking it. I want to know more, learn more about these angels and understand their world.

Reading Hidden brought me to another world just like how I used to read Harry Potter where wizard world was where I entered. Not saying Hidden is comparable to Harry Potter, it's just that this book comes from its own world, nicely written by Marianne Curley so that we could learn from the Avena and the Angels within this world.

Therefore, as I told you before, Im never gonna rate a book for their own beauty. But I believe this book worth a read and I did not waste the splendid of time I spent to read it.

I just need to get my hands on Broken! (the sequel I mean). Have fun reading! :)

Farzana Rosley.

Monday, July 21, 2014

Reunion ; Expectation and Reality.

Assalamualaikum wbt and hello everyone :)

This post is basically what Im feeling about what is going to happen during our batch reunion. It happened twice so Im not sure whether the next one will turn out the same but I surely do feel quite irritated with what happened compared to what is supposed to be happening.

1. The number of people.

I expected a reunion should include many people. And not that I can blame those who did not want to attend, but not making a effort to go to one makes some people tend not to go to. And yes, I dont feel like going this year's reunion too. (Which means it will make a group of my friends won't go too.) 

Cre; Google.

2. The reuniting session.

The thing that always goes wrong in a reunion party is that we do not reunite at all? Most people sit with their old gang whom they actually meet up occasionally so there's no perfect reunion actually occurred. 

When there's a reunion, we reunite! That's how it's supposed to be. Talk with everyone. Better yet, make a huge circle and start telling what is going on with our lives. Is that hard? You speak to people you last met a long time ago, fairly. Not only to your group of people.

It's not like I have anyone to blame about this since I was the ones who organized one. And pretty much disappointed with the response and cooperation. But what I am questioning is, why make one when we don't actually reunite at all? Or is it just me who's feeling this way? 

Pffft. Years passed, and the bond of the batch mates does not seem to be tighter but pretty much loosening.

Well Im sorry if this is harsh but exactly what I am feeling zzzzz. 



Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Book Review #1: Being Friends with Boys - Terra Elan McVoy by Farzanaley

Assalamualaikum wbt and hello thereeee :D

It's been a while since I wrote my last post (and I guess this sounds very annoying because Ive been using the exact same sentence to start my post). Well hello, whatever. I guess Im pretty excited to write today. First, obviously because it's been a while. Secondly, hey, Ive got a thing to talk about! Woohooo. Well it's not like I didnt have anything to talk about before but I just did not put the effort to even write one because Im not sure whether my post would be beneficial or just another pose of me rambling things.

So yeah. Let's get things started. I'm a beginner at these things so please tell me if there's some that I do wrong ;3 One more thing, I'm the type of person who would sometimes tell too much till you kinda get the spoiler and you need not read the novel anymore~ BUT, I promise I won't do it by the end of this post. Trust me :D

One more thing, writing a book review has always been an idea that my friends put into my head. It's just that I was lazy.......... so yeah, while now Im making effort, you better read, people! Ahah XD

Book Review #1: Being Friends with Boys - Terra Elan McVoy
Hahaha this is the photo I took and posted it on my Instagram xP
I'm not pretty much sure on how to start (told ya Im new), but surely I would give you the summary written at the back of the book :)

"Charlotte and Oliver have been friends forever. She knows that he, Abe and Trip consider her to be one of the gang, and she likes it that way. She likes being the friend who keeps them all together. Likes offering a girl's perspective on their love lives. Likes being the behind-the-scenes wordsmith who writes all the lyrics for the boys' band. Char has a house full of stepsisters and a past full of backstabbling (female) ex-best friends, so for her, being friends with boys is refreshingly drama-free... until it isn't anymore.
When a new boy enters the scene and makes Char feel like, well, a total girl... and two of her other friends have a falling out that may or may not be related to one of them deciding he possibly wants to be more than friends with Char... being friends with all these boys suddenly becomes a lot more complicated."

And that, my friends, is what written at the back of the book. 

Honestly, the moment I finished the book, I would say, hell no the summary is confusing because truthfully, there isn't only one new guy that entered the scene after Trip decided to leave the band they're in, but two of them.

Yes, one of them, is Fabian - the hot new guy in band. He's there, nice and made things real awkward that Char had to control and act cool all the time he was there. We could all tell that he's the new guy that made Char swoon like a girl.

However, the new guy that made one of her guy friends' said wanted to be "more than friends" with Char was Benji. Here comes Benji, another new guy who was always there for her to rescue her failing 20 Cen.(subject). He was not in the band, but he was there with Char.

The start was diff with these two. The way I explained it made it sound like it's just a love story. WAIT, NO. Remember the title? "being friends with boys", How did it all start anyway? 

So, let's all move on to Char. 

Char is the girl in the story, she's the one who's being friends with all these boys in the story. It's not like she hates girls, she used to have one, Lish. But not sure how things happened when they were suddenly not friends anymore.

And it's not like she had a terrible life either. One might say that she lives in a broken family because her parents are divorced, but honestly, her stepmom, Hannah wasn't all bad either. She isn't a modern Cinderella, she got two terrific stepsisters (Gretchen and Darcy) and they were always there when Jill (her real sister) wasn't there.

I honestly like this novel for its purity. The author, Terra wan't trying to make Char sounded pathetic at all. She does have the inner side of girly things in her, despite her spending most of the time with her boy friends, she does want to put some make up when she went out with Fabian, and dress up prettily (with some limits still since she never really dress up).

So Im not sure how I should end this hahaha.

Im afraid, if I talk more, Im gonna spill everything hahaha. However, lemme give tell you what occured in my head when I was reading through it.

Since she surely will end up with someone too, I put (or would honestly call it as rate) these guys on my list:

1. Fabian (because for God's sake, she dressed up for him!)

2. Benji (she's been hanging out with him, he's nice, funny and she's all comfortable with him and his jokes. He also lends her his notes and they helped her with her study!)

3. Oliver (just because. well yknow, Oliver and her has been friends for like years. they're close! so, I guess, who knows? It might be the one who's always there. It's just Char or even Oliver himself can't see it that they might are meant for each other. They might be more than just friends?)

4. Trip (just the same reason why I would rate Oliver. but I put him last because he left the band. so... I wasnt sure. however, she's all comfortable with him. they exchange opinions/stories; on life rather than study in one notebook that only they read during class. she thought about him a lot is the reason I put him in this rating list.)

And of course, the rating list I made was just my PERSONAL OPINION. I repeat, they're all personal as I read through the story and it didn't end as how I rate it at all. Im all in with Benji because he's nice but well, you've gotta read it man! Hahaha

It's all good. Not that I don't like this kind of genre, it's just that I rarely picked one. So now that I have finally read one, I think it would be good to read a lot more on any kinds of genres. 

So I believe, there goes my book review. My first book review, by Terra Elan McAvoy, Being Friends With Boys.

I don't like rating books. They're good on their own. The beauty of a story is subjective. Therefore, have fun reading! :D It's not a heavy story, rather a light and relaxing one. :)

Thank you,
Farzana Rosley.

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Disease of writing,

Well hello and salam'alayk everyone.

It's like 10-15 days before final. And I realized I have a disease, which occurs only when the exam is near.

Like, right now? Ahaha, my exam is like around the corner (really at the edge I won't lie) but hell yeah, I feel like writing.
And currently Im actually doing my reflections (my assignment) so yeah Ive done two. So Im gonna take 5 and write this nonsense that no one would even read lol,

Im not sure why does this disease even exist, and why does it only occur to me and myself only? Or is it me that is too crazy not knowing how to manage things wisely? Aaaaaaaaaaa idek anymore.

So that's it actually. I just randomly write things, and planning to write more after this. Which includes my feelings; especially after what happened to Kris :( , living life with fellow Spartans and my withdrawal from certain people whom I see not worth standing together anymore.

I believe for the time being, that's my choice, yep I do.

And I believe I have this identity crisis but Im pretty sure of my choices,

That's it for now.
2 more reflections to go,adios.


Tuesday, February 18, 2014


Assalamualaikum wbt. Hello everyone^^

Ok, here's a thing. Last Sunday my sister asked me to go and listen to Dr. Danial Zainal Abidin's talk. It's a weekly thing, and he just started with the first surah of the holy Quraan, ummul kitab Al-Fatihah.

At first, I couldn't deny how reluctant I was and I kept giving excuses as long as I dont have to go to the class (obviously because I had to register my second semester in USM already so I was kinda lazy). Well in short, I ended up going after my sister pursued me and promised to help unpacking my stuff (which she did anyway).

Plus, I know I kinda need something for the inside too, since Ive been doing a lot of 'lagho' things these days T_T yknow, makanan rohani :)

So the first day I went was good. And instead of keeping it to myself, I decided to share it here, on my blog. I should start writing something that is not only beneficial for me, but some other people. I just hope it would. :)

Somehow, the first lesson is something that I have learnt, but it's okay since Im going to share it anyway!

The first lesson was about the first sentence of the Quraan, which is "Bismillahirrahmanirrahim." (shortly called Basmallah).

1. It starts with 'bi' which brings the meaning 'dengan'. (in Arabic, ayat ni dikira tergantung sebab we suddenly start a sentence dengan perkataan 'bi = dengan'. Sebab it says ; Bismi = Dengan nama. *it's pretty weird, however a very unique introduction. 

2. This brings a conclusion that was drawn by Sheikh Hamka which sounds like this,

 "Penggunaan perkataan 'dengan' di permulaan ayat shows that as we recite the sentence in whatever things we are doing, we do it for the sake of Allah. 

i.e; Basmallah before makan (Im eating this lillah), Basmallah before tidoq (Im sleeping lillah). *THIS, in short shows that reading Basmallah is a way in making our simple daily routine becoming our daily ibadah. U gemme? :D

3. Ar-Rahman (Maha Pemurah) *one of asma ul-husna :)
  • sifat ar-Rahman ni umum
  • Allah is nice to everyone, despite our differences in religions and races
This is shown in one of ayatul Quran, "Allah tidak akan menzalimi makhluk-Nya walaupun sedikit." Nampak tak Allah tu Maha Adil? :)

4. Ar-Rahim (Maha Penyayang) *also one of asma ul-husna :)
  • sifat ar-Rahim pulak khas (khusus)
  • Allah sayang hamba-Nya yang beriman.
5. In solat, there are a lot of opinions from great sheikhs on the way we read Basmallah. Do we have to read it loudly or do we have to read it slowly? (The Imam especially). Therefore, there's a lot to share just for this part :3

Dr. Bilal Philips (salah seorang ulama', pakar agama if Im not mistaken) said that Sejarah Islam proves that ONCE, in Mekah; depan Kaabah, they prayed for FOUR times at every solat. Kenapa 4 times? Sebab these people pray ikut their Mazhab punya Imam. 

THIS, showed that masa tu maybe kelemahan pemerintah. But gladly, now alhamdulillah we only pray once for every solat time kan :) Yelah,

" Innamal mukminuunal ikhwah." - Sesungguhnya orang beriman (Islam) itu bersaudara! :)

6. Sebelum baca Basmallah, disunatkan baca ayat untuk mintak perlindungan :

"A'uzubillahi minassyaitonirrojim." (Isti'azah.)

Wallahu'alam bissowab :) Setakat ni ja mampu share berdasarkan notes that I wrote. InshaAllah I will share more when I get more^^

Yg silap lemah tu datang dari kelemahan beta sendiri :3

Farzana Rosley
Fartvxqhlovate :)

Thursday, February 6, 2014 continue isn't a choice


At times like this, when I feel like writing is when I feel down.

Yes. The result came out today. But just the provisional ones, to show either we passed the subjects we took, or otherwise.
And alhamdulillah. I passed it all. By next week we will all know the full result, which I choose not to know.

It's not the matter that I can't accept my result after all I have been through my first semester of my degree. It's just that I can't accept no matter how good or bad it is, for what I have been, for the first semester.

This ain't Farzana. This ain't the old me. I am, totally disappointed for what I have been throughout the semester.
I can't lie to myself. I know how worse I have became compared to my old self during my foundation year. 

At times like this, I can only think of giving up. But I know I cant. My family doesnt give up on me. God doesn't. Then why should I?

The entire holiday, I keep telling myself that I should change, for better to deserve something good. To live such a great life, God has granted us, I should do better. 

I know I have never forgotten the wise saying by Saidina Ali that if a person today is worse that his yesterday, he is a person that has been beguiled (terpedaya) of his life.

I should have made myself prepared for the new semester. I have made my mind. To continue going to usrah. Tho I have been there only once. (sorry kak usrah. I expect too much of myself. And be active in unnecessary things.)

I will do my best to start being better. And join things Im only capable of doing. Being MPD already, I have no choice but to finish it till the end. 

Continue the progress I have made isn't a choice. It's a fate that God has put me into place. And my only choice that I can pick is to do it well. Himnae, Farzana.

All the best, Farzana! Allahu ma'ana. Prioritize, focus and change for better. Tajdid niat. Robbi yassir walaa tu'assir.

- Fartvxqhlovate

Thursday, January 9, 2014

...I know my answer would never be yes

Assalamualaikum wbt.

These days Ive been told with the news of my friends' beloved dads passing away. Al-Fatihah.

I didnt inform my Mum or any other family members but these friends of mine are good friends of mine. I mean yeah we were not really close but we once were either classmates or used to hang out together.

I made a lot of friends. I dont know if I have ever been a good one but these people are totally great friends of mine. I love the ukhuwah that we built for the pass few years that we have known each of us from high school. And the story of their family member leaving this world, somehow cant stop me from being sad. Although the level of our friendship isnt that strong but as we became friends, the ukhuwah we built exist. And the feeling of sadness somehow hit me as how it hit them, (just a little less pain compared to theirs.)

Talking about leaving this world. I have always told myself that I should get ready. But what have I been doing exactly? I'm not sure. I don't know. I cant simply blame the surrounding or busy life that I have been facing. Im the one who chose it.

And by this time, with little tears in my eyes. I would want to remind myself, to realize that death waits for no one. Yes these friends of mine might lost their family member, leaving them. I might lose someone too one day. And people might lose me, someday.

It will eventually happen. The thing is, are we ready?

I know my answer would never be yes....

The Almighty says, "When their specified time arrives, they cannot delay it for a single hour nor can they bring it forward," (16:61)


Wednesday, January 8, 2014

how interest could change my attitude

Hi assalamualaikum wbt :) 

so this is a random rambling in the middle of my study moment.............*in which I just started and there's not much I have studied tho. 

And once Ive gotten my result I know Im gonna look back and blame this post all over because I wasted my writing instead of studying. Ahah.

*pic is credit on google. and tumblr I guess.

Since Ive started writing why should I bother anyway. I should end this post hahaha. Ok it aint funny.

So yeah hm. What should I say. *I dont even know what to write yet I want to write?!
*glanced the title.* I know. What do I meant by that.

There's this one subject that we have to take, as our minor. It's a multimedia subject and that's my paper Im gonna sit in another 7 hours. And how interest could change my attitude is that, this subject is not what I chose. I was given and there's no option for us to choose what we want as our minor. It's pretty disappointing tho. Since I have a lot in my mind to take as my minor :(

Somehow, since Im already into this, I shouldnt fail myself, ey? Plus, alhamdulillah my carry mark in this subject and some other few subjects (except for Literature obviously hahah) are good. Alhamdulillah.

So everyone, 

"Dont give up to the end. Finish what you have started." - DBSK Jung Yunho.

So I dont want my final paper to ruin my pointer. Let's just hope I can do well. And my friends too. I pray for every single of us to do well. Himnae, girls! Love you :)